Friday, July 15, 2011

The Toxic Train

The Best Choices we make in Life are often the hardest.

We must be brave & courageous to ask ourselves,
Have we really left the KoN behind?

Are we heading in the Right Direction or Did we just get on board a less Toxic Train?

We have got to take a very close look at our ticket,
Does it say "Not as Bad as", Not that Bad or Not Nearly As Bad?

The Trains we travel on can be very Deceptive. For example when we think less Toxic Trains are better than what we had before or at least Good Enough we are looking at the World from a very limited perspective. Less Toxic is still No Good. It is still harmful. Less harm is still not any Good. If is hurtful in any way, it is still harmful. Some Toxic Trains go straight to the Land of Abuse, some take a detour and go through a less obvious route, but it eventually leads to Destination Dysfunction or Abuse.

Have you been lied to all your Life, like I have been, that there are no other Trains to take, there are no other ones available, and all Trains lead to Dysfunction? All Families and Relationships are Dysfunctional.

That is Evil Propaganda my Friend that deceives us to purchasing tickets on Toxic Trains that lead us through one kind of Hell after another. Some People eventually refuse to travel by Train, because they can no longer trust others and lead an isolated Life. We were not created to go through Life's Journey alone. There is another Choice available. There are Trains that take us to a Great Destination. Just because we did not find them in the past does not mean they do not exist.

When we are considering taking a New Train we must check out & fully inspect each compartment. Some compartments are filled with Counterfeits, as in Counterfeit Christians. Because we got into a Bad Compartment made up of Counterfeits who hurt us, Does that mean the entire Train is Bad? No. The Conductor is still Great and the Destination is still Awesome. There are other Compartments that are worth checking out. Don't jump off the Train just because there is one, or two, or even three Bad Compartments.

A Train can not select who gets on Board it. Some will be Authentic & Loving and some will be carrying Old Baggage, and some will be Counterfeits. The Counterfeits will deceive us and say they are the Conductor, or that they speak for the Conductor, or a Substitute for the Conductor, because the Conductor can't be reached or that we don't have what it takes, don't have the proper credentials to speak directly with the Conductor -- these are all lies. We do have access to speak directly to the Conductor any time & any where we want or need to do so. The Conductor is available to us 24/7 and all we have to do is say Conductor I want or need to speak to you. The Conductor doesn't care where we have been, or the mistakes we have made only that we now want to have a relationship with Him. Developing a personal close relationship directly with the Conductor will help us select Great Compartments to enjoy along our Journey.

When we don't have a personal close relationship with the Conductor, when we have only heard about him and don't have a relationship with him we can end up in Bad Compartments. The Conductor is not to blame for the Counterfeits in his Compartments. We have a choice to make. We can take responsibility for choosing the Bad Compartment, for being deceived by the Counterfeits and those who have Toxic & Damaged Baggage, and for not noticing or being aware of the Red Flags outside of the Bad Compartments. Maybe we didn't know what the Red Flags meant, so it is up to us to find out. I recommend going straight to the Conductor and having a conversation via prayer, and reading the Conductor's Manual, because there is tons of Great Info in there about Counterfeits, Toxic, and Evil Beings known as Reprobates and Unrepentant Sinners that Lack a Conscience & enjoy hurting others.

The Creator of the Train and the Person who appointed the Conductor wants our Journey to be Wonderful. The Creator has Great Plans for our Life and Abuse was Never apart of it. Where There is Love There is No Abuse and Where there is Abuse There is No Love. Jeremiah 29:11

I do not have all the answers, but what I know for sure is that GOD loves each one of us. I do not understand all of GOD's ways. There is Free Will and the N in our Life chose to abuse us, and each time the N abused us it did break GOD's heart because GOD is a Loving & Holy Parent that wants only the very Best for us. As much as I would like to protect my Child, there will be others who will choose to hurt her. All I can do is teach her that she does not have to have contact with those who will not or can not reciprocate Love and enjoy hurting her. It is up to my Child to learn what I have taught her about Authentic Loving People, and when she has been deceived by a Counterfeit, either a Damaged or Disordered Person, or Evil Being then she is to leave that Person, leave that Compartment and not blame her Parent. By having a close loving relationship with her Parent my Child develops Discernment. It is a Blessing to her Life when she has Applied Knowledge and detects the Red Flags, and can avoid the Bad Compartments filled with Counterfeit & Toxic People. The more she uses her Gift the Stronger it will get, and the closer & stronger our Relationship becomes the more she can learn directly from me instead of being deceived by others. She will be able to avoid the Toxic Trains that have the Destination Dysfunction & Abuse.

The Toxic Train
Growing up, Toxic Trains were the only ones I thought existed in this World. When you are born and raised in the KoN the only trains that come by are Toxic Trains filled with Counterfeits, Damaged or Disordered People and Evil Beings. However, while I was on the Toxic Train surrounded by darkness I noticed there were a few Authentic Loving People who had such a Beautiful Light shining from within them. They Loved me unconditionally and they shared their wonderful heart with me. The spoke words of Praise and Encouragement which was absent in the Toxic Train. They spoke about had GOD had a Great Plan for my Life and how GOD loved me. These Loving People are warm, comforting, compassionate, inspiring, encouraging, and empowering unlike anyone else I knew on this Toxic Train. I had to learn more about where they came from and where they planned on going. They shared their Life with me and how I longed to be apart of that Life, but before I could find out any more the Psycho Parents made them leave the Toxic Train. The Psycho Parents trash talked these People of Light and I found out that they belonged to a Compartment called Authentic & Loving Christians. Throughout my Life's Journey GOD would bring more Amazing Christians into my Life and it was due to them that led me to become one of them and it was through my Personal Relationship with Jesus Christ that transformed me into the Person I am today. Life is about Progression not Perfection. Life is about Loving Others and being Loved by Others. Life is about changing the Train you are on until you know you are headed in the Right Direction.

When the Counterfeit Conductor (covert N) calls out, "all on board" we must refuse to get on Board with everyone else. We must be brave & courageous to go against the crowd and fight through all the FOG (Fear Obligation Guilt) that they create in order for us to stay with them & just get on board. We got to face rejection & abandonment when they get on board and head off to Destination Dysfunction. We have got to give them our old baggage and tell them to take it with them, yes I know you gave it to me, but it doesn't suit me anymore. Prepare ourselves for the retaliations & attacks. The covert attack, aka Guilt Trip, that has the intent to change our mind and hold on to the old baggage they gave us for sentimental reasons, after all you better hold on to it because you never know when you might need it. After all, how can you travel through life without baggage. Everybody has baggage! They have an insidious way of making you feel bad for wanting to get rid of your old baggage & that you are doing something terribly wrong by choosing to travel without baggage. If the covert attacks do not work then the direct attacks begin making us feel lesser than and out of fear & insecurity we can be tempted to hold on to the old baggage.

We can not get hooked into the fight with having to explain ourselves, or encouraging others to give up their old baggage. Look out for that last minute, and last second FOG rolling in that the old baggage "was the best we could do for you". Just say to those who are all on board the N-train that it is their choice to keep the old baggage, and they can have ours too, because we don't need it any more. We plan to Travel light from here on out, baggage free. As long as we remain on the N-train and refuse to carry old baggage we will not fit in with others who carry lots of baggage. We will look so strange to them and be ostracized and alienated for being different and not enjoy carrying baggage. We will be attacked and made to feel Lesser Than for having baggage Lesser Than Them. When we look outside of our own window on the N-Train we will see others who get on board the Love Train with very little if any baggage and how Free their Lives are without baggage. We can even see how far they can go when they are not held down confined and constrained by the weight of all the old baggage. We have a choice to make stay on board the N-train or leave. Leaving is never easy, but always necessary if we want to enjoy our Journey & even more importantly change our Destination.

We encourage our Love Ones to get off the N-train with us, but no matter how much they complain about all the old baggage piling up, filling up, exploding on them and hurting them, they just won't change they way they travel & leave the N-train. Some are afraid to leave what they have always known behind. They are afraid of change, no matter how great it looks outside their own window. Some think the N-train accommodations in the Toxic Compartments are "not that bad" compared to other Toxic Trains, and some actually enjoy their Toxic Environment because they are also Disordered Counterfeits like the Counterfeit Conductor. Those who have been extremely Damaged won't leave when you leave and some wont ever leave and they will teach their own Children to take the N-train. We must realize that we can not help those who do not want to be helped. We can not save those who do not to be saved. Each person must decide to leave the N-train on their own time. And now it is our time to leave.

As the passengers of the N-train get comfortable in each of their Toxic Compartments it will seem like they are turning their backs on you and they are because they are facing in an opposite direction and heading towards Destination Dysfunction & Disaster. You will feel like you are being left behind and from their perspective, from their point of view from where they are sitting heading towards a different Destination in their mind you are being left behind.

HOWEVER escaping the KoN is about seeing Reality from a Different Perspective and Point of View. It is not about being Left Behind, but rather Letting Go. It is about knowing where the N-trains leads and not wanting to go there anymore. It is about making one of the Greatest Choices in your Life and leaving the Past Behind. At the Station it is not only about knowing where you don't want to go, but discovering where you do want to go. It is about interacting with others, sharing your Life with others and listen about the Experiences of others where they have come from and where they are going in Life. It is about observing others heading off in the Right Direction. It is about Trusting others because they are Authentic Loving People, because they have Honor, Integrity, Empathy, Compassion, they Love GOD and it shows. It is not about finding a Religion, but having an Awesome Personal Relationship with Jesus and having Amazing Relationships with others who also have an Awesome Personal Relationship with Jesus.

They follow the Son and they shine so brightly that they can help us out of the darkness. As we get on board we notice their Train is headed in a completely opposite direction. In each compartment we notice Chaos is Absent and Peace is Present. It is unusual, not familiar to what we have been accustomed to and at first it is uncomfortable & strange, because we don't recognize it as Normal. It is a New Normal. A Healthy & Loving Normal and it takes a little bit to get use to, but once we settle in we realize it is Wonderful. Some times we can get a little nervous because nothing Toxic has happened for awhile and we can't see anything Toxic coming, so we get a little afraid that something unexpectedly horrible is going to happen that we are not prepared to handle. But we are lovingly reminded that we are no longer on board the Toxic Train. We are on the Authentic Love Train. Destination Land of Love (LoL). We can get use to the Love Train. We can get so fully on Board that it becomes our New Normal, and when a Toxic Train passes along the side of us heading in the opposite direction there is no temptation what so ever to join them, because no matter how much fun they look like they are having or that they appear to be having we know looks are deceiving on the N train. We know their closets are filled with skeletons, that stuff that is dished out and served to others is Very Toxic, contaminates and damages who we are & our Quality of Life. We know they are all headed for Destination Dysfunction & Disaster. Do we really want to go there -- again? No Way! They can keep their Grand Illusion on the N-Train and their Journey will be filled with pain, hurt sorrow, and regret while they are headed to Destination Dysfunction & Abuse. The Illusion is Over. There is no longing to be apart of the N-Train. We have complete Peace, because they can go their way and we will go our's.

On our Life Journey we must realize what Train we are on board and where is its Destination. While we are on the Train we can decide how we want to build our own Compartment. What tools are we going to utilize and where are we going to get the materials from? Once our Compartment is Complete we can decide who we are going to have joining Compartments with and for how long. We can visit other Compartments and make improvements and upgrades on our own. Our Children and Loved Ones will be Blessed by the upgrades we have made and when they are ready to build their own Compartments they are going to utilize the same material and replicate for the most part what we have done. They may choose to do some things differently and realize that what we created was Best no matter what many others told them how ours was Old Fashion and "everyone else is doing things differently these days". Our Children's will be tempted to listen to the lies of others, to do what is Popular instead of what is the Best for them and unfortunately they will contaminate their compartments. We can help them clean up some of their messes and other messes they will have to clean up all on their own. It is in the Consequence of the Clean Up that we learn the valuable Lesson to prevent Contamination from Toxic Counterfeit People. Life is about Learning to Discern Right from Wrong, Healthy from Unhealthy, Good from Bad, and Holy from Evil. It will be our Children's Choice to improve upon what we have done, so that their Children will be Blessed even more along their own Journey. Life is a Journey. We each have the choice on how & with whom we are going to Travel.

GOD Bless Your Journey,
Letting Go


  1. I like your analogies. :)

    you wrote:
    //On our Life Journey we must realize what Train we are on board and where is its Destination//

    so important. We were "trained" to "react" but it is our divine responsibility to ourselves to seek counsel from within.

    Bless your journey, Dove.

  2. Cheshire thank you so much. These analogies make sense to me. It helps to explain the unexplainable existence in the KoN. It helps me to clarify what we all have endured.

    You are so right about being "trained" to "react". In the KoN, the N controls & rules at the very center making everything and everyone revolve around him/her. We are constantly living a Life of Defense & be reactive to the N instead of Proactive to & for Self. The focus in Always on the N. We never give ourselves the Freedom to ask, What is Best for Self? What do I need & want in a Relationship & out of Life? When we do we discover the need to be "untrained" and get deprogrammed from all the brainwashing of the N. Educating ourselves on what Authentic & Amazing Love is all about is the way to our Freedom, our Passion & Purpose in Life. The meaning to Life is to Love One Another.