Monday, February 1, 2010

She sees YOU

She sees you brush and style your hair
Put on your make-up and pick out what to wear

She sees you put on your favorite perfume
And how your fragrance now fills the room

She sees you think, do and say and how you go about your day

She sees you sing and dance and learns that she too can take a chance

She sees how your presence brings joy, lights up and fills the room,
and when you are gone, she misses you and wants you back soon.

She sees how you whisper softly; I love you, in her ear
And she knows she is never alone, and you are always here

She sees how you love her and hold her tight and that you would protect her with all your might.

She runs to you to show you her most valued possession
Because to her you are number one and there is no exception

Do you see how she looks at you with those big beautiful eyes
And you are the only one she wants and runs to when she cries

She sees all the beauty that’s inside of you
Isn’t time that you see what she sees too?

This poem was inspired by Papa God, my handsome husband and my beautiful daughter.

Along my healing journey I realized that the flip side of self-hate is self-worth. It is definitely a hard transition to make and I don't always get it right to this day. What I found is that the more I saw myself through God's eyes the more I accepted the fact that
my life has meaning and purpose. Family and friends have a purpose in one's life and that is to encourage, support, and bring us up not pull us down-that is the enemy's job. My feelings and thoughts should be validated and the people in my life that don't respect my feelings or thoughts are toxic and I don't need them in my life. It has taken me over 40 years to get rid of this brainwashing that I am "less than", "not good enough", and "not worth it". No matter how hard you try, cry, and pray, some people will never validate you, and it is especially hard when it is your own parent. I decided that life is too precious of a gift to waste my time on those who really don't care about me and reinforce my own self-doubts/self-loathing and to focus on those who encourage and support me and help me realize how beautiful I am to God & to those that truly love me. We can easily see the beauty in our children, but it is so hard to see the beauty in ourselves. I constantly marvel at how physically beautiful my daughter is and how beautiful her spirit is that gives her such a loving thoughtful heart. When I was having one of those self-downing days my awesome husband said, "Beauty only comes from Beauty". We must see the beauty that lies within us, if not for our own sake then for our children. We must cast down those ugly thoughts that come to steal our joy and our abundant life. This new ability to value myself and to cast away anything that comes to tear me down has given me a new found freedom to actually love and enjoy life.

Please realize how very precious you are to God and that He created you for a specific purpose that only
YOU can fulfill. He created you, thus you are worth it! Your abundant life will begin when you know that you are worth it. Take it one step at a time. You love and you are lovable and nothing less will do. You deserve the very best this world has to offer.
You are beautiful, because you are His child.

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